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Who can understand men?

作者：桑儿  于 2009-4-4 02:32 发表于 最热闹的华人社交网络--贝壳村

作者分类:杂七杂八|通用分类:其它日志|已有41评论

今天和Lisa聊天，一不小心说到了男人，她的嘴巴突然象上了膛的机关枪，竟然也妙语连珠。想了半天，决定还是不翻译，似乎看原文更过瘾一些。
 
The nice men are ugly.
The handsome men are not nice.
The handsome and nice men are gay.
The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.
The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.
The men who are not so hadsome, but are nice men with money, think we are only after their money.
The handsome men without money are after our money.
The handsome men who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual don't think we are beautiful enough.
The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money are pigs.
The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and thank God are heterosexual are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!
The men who never make the first move automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.
NOW, WHO IN THE WORLD UNDERSTANDS MEN?
 
在她说到we aren't beautiful enough的时候，我说，等一下，等一下，太经典了,待我先把前面的记下来。她也笑了，火气消了一半，但还是骂了男人是猪。
6

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发表评论 评论 (41 个评论)

1 回复 练精化气AAA 2009-4-4 02:34
严重同意，男人都是猪。好像有句谚语是这么说来着
0 回复 xqw63 2009-4-4 02:37
严重抗议，女权主义者。
1 回复 trump 2009-4-4 02:37
哈哈
The nice men are ugly.
好男人不帅。
The handsome men are not nice.
帅男人不好。
The handsome and nice men are gay.
又帅又好的男人是同性恋。
The handsome, nice and hetero men are married.
又帅又好又不是同性恋的男人都结婚了。
men who are not so handsome but are nice men have no money.
不是很帅但是很好的男人却没有钱。
The men who are not so handsome but are nice men with money think we are only
after their money.
不是很帅但是又好又有钱的男人会认为我们看上的是他们的钱。
The handsome men without money are after our money.
而没有钱但是很帅的男人看上的是我们的钱。
The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat
hetero don’t think we are beautiful enough.
不是很好但是很帅又是异性恋的男人却嫌我们不够漂亮。
The men who think we are beautiful, that are hetero,
somewhat nice and have money are cowards.
又好又有钱又是异性恋又觉得我们漂亮的男人却又没胆量。
The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money, and thank God, are hetero are shy and NEVER MaKE THE FIRST MOVE!
又好又帅又有点钱而且是个异性恋的男人偏偏害羞而且从不采取行动。
1 回复 练精化气AAA 2009-4-4 02:38
xqw63: 严重抗议，女权主义者。
抗啥议呀。你傻呀
1 回复 homepeace 2009-4-4 02:39
0 回复 sujie_alex 2009-4-4 02:42
1 回复 桑儿 2009-4-4 02:44
trump: 哈哈
The nice men are ugly.
好男人不帅。
The handsome men are not nice.
帅男人不好。
The handsome and nice men are gay.
又帅又好的男人是同性恋。
The
谢谢！我也把那几个字改成capital吧。
0 回复 xyz000usa 2009-4-4 02:45
又好又有钱又是异性恋又觉得我们漂亮的男人当他们不再害羞而有胆量时身边却有好多好多和我们一样漂亮的女人
0 回复 一刻中文 2009-4-4 02:45
0 回复 xqw63 2009-4-4 02:50
练精化气AAA: 抗啥议呀。你傻呀
没事就表达一下心声，知道没用
1 回复 nnyycc 2009-4-4 02:57
没找到自己的座位。麻烦你问问她不好又难看的男人是什么
1 回复 homepeace 2009-4-4 02:59
村里又帅又好又不是同性恋的男人都结婚了。的确！
1 回复 史无前例 2009-4-4 03:17
The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.
1 回复 SirCat 2009-4-4 03:20
听了半天，得出结论：Lisa既不漂亮又没钱。
呵呵
1 回复 ndht 2009-4-4 03:26
How to Make a Woman Happy

> It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only
> needs to be:
> 1. a friend  > 2. a companion  > 3. a lover   > 4. a brother
> 5. a father  > 6. a master    > 7. a chef    > 8. an electrician
> 9. a carpenter  > 10. a plumber   > 11. a mechanic > 12. a decorator
> 13. a stylist  > 14. a sexologist  > 15. a gynecologist  > 16. a psychologist
> 17. a pest exterminator > 18. a psychiatrist  > 19. a healer  > 20. a good listener
> 21. an organizer   > 22. a good father  > 23. very clean   > 24. sympathetic
> 25. athletic   > 26. war   > 27. attentive   > 28. gallant
> 29. intelligent    > 30. funny   > 31. creative    > 32. tender
> 33. strong    > 34. understanding  > 35. tolerant   > 36. prudent
> 37. ambitious  > 38. capable  > 39. courageous   > 40. determined
> 41. true  > 42. dependable > 43. passionate   > 44. compassionate
> WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
> 45. give her compliments regularly  > 46. love shopping
> 47. be honest  > 48. be very rich
> 49. not stress her out   > 50. not look at other girls
>
> AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
>
> 51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
> 52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
> 53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she
> goes
>
> IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
>
> 54. Never to forget:
> * birthdays   > * anniversaries   > * arrangements she makes
>

> HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
>
> 1. Show up naked   > 2. Bring food  > 3. Bring Beer
1 回复 MG-42 2009-4-4 03:31
男人是猪
1 回复 桑儿 2009-4-4 03:54
nnyycc: 没找到自己的座位。麻烦你问问她不好又难看的男人是什么
不可以太刻薄~是人都有长处~~
1 回复 桑儿 2009-4-4 03:57
SirCat: 听了半天，得出结论：Lisa既不漂亮又没钱。
呵呵
她主要是犯了照相时镜头里什么都要的错误~
1 回复 SirCat 2009-4-4 04:00
桑儿: 她主要是犯了照相时镜头里什么都要的错误~
您是说太贪？那也是。呵呵
估计只要她一旦有了个相好（也同她好）的，所有牢骚会立刻烟消云散。
呵呵
1 回复 桑儿 2009-4-4 04:02
ndht: How to Make a Woman Happy

> It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only
> needs to be:
> 1. a friend  > 2. a companion  > 3
这里的woman和man不是同一个系统的概念哎~
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