真心痛，美国华人父母对自己小孩说不出的话,中英对照版

献给我们华人子女们的一封信                 刘龙珠律师

当你们的父母第一次踏上美国的土地时，他们带来的不仅仅是行李和护照。他们带来的是希望，是几代人的重量，是延续家族荣誉的责任，更是一个梦想，希望他们的孩子，能过上比他们更加光明和自由的生活。

我们父母的牺牲

对许多父母来说，“美国梦”并不是奢华的象征，而是生存的意义。我认识一些父母，他们从清晨忙到深夜，在餐馆里洗碗到双手因热水而裂开。我认识一些母亲，她们在工厂的缝纫机前一站就是十二个小时，腰背弯曲，双眼酸痛，只为了让孩子有钱买午饭。我认识一些父亲，他们夜里开出租车，穿行在危险的街区，默默祈祷能平安回家，只为了家人能交得起房租。这些并不是遥远的故事

，而是无数在美华人父母每日真实的牺牲。

他们为何忍受艰辛

他们为什么要忍受这些苦难？并不是为了自己。他们并不是为了在这里继续受苦才离开祖国、文化和熟悉的生活。他们是因为你们而来。他们希望你们能坐在教室里，而不是工厂里；希望你们能说一口流利的英语；希望你们能自由成长，拥有追梦的权利。

他们付出的代价

他们付出了代价，只为你们不必再付出。每一滴汗水、每一个不眠之夜、每一次默默忍受的屈辱，都是他们为你们未来所付出的定金。他们放弃了安逸，只为了给你们更多选择；他们吞下了委屈，只为了你们能昂首挺胸；他们背负了生存的重担，只为了你们能够专注成长。他们所打的仗，并不是为了自己，而是为了让你们继承胜利。正因他们的牺牲，你们如今才能站在这里，去追求知识、抱负与成功，而不用背负他们曾经的重担。

拒绝平庸与美国梦的真谛

然而，太多时候，我看到这一代的孩子们在浪费这份礼物。太多人满足于平庸，告诉自己“差不多就好”。可平庸并不是你们父母来美国的目的，他们来是为了让你们追求卓越。

“美国梦”不是睡前的童话，也不是虚构的神话。它是真实存在的，只要你们愿意付出努力。不要被那句空洞的话迷惑——“我只做让我快乐的事”。如果你们每月都要为房租发愁，每天都在担心下个月是否能付得起账单，你们真的会快乐吗？如果冰箱是空的，如果父母年老多病你们却无力帮助，你们真的能安心吗？如果你们甚至不敢谈起成就，因为心底明白根本没有什么可说，你们真的会自豪吗？真正的快乐不在于短暂的享乐，而在于建立起一种稳定的生活——不必为生存担忧

，能够自豪地抬起头，因为你们实现了自己的潜能。

 

通往成功没有单一路径

但我要告诉你们一件重要的事：追逐梦想没有固定的路径。没有唯一的地图，也没有统一的公式。你们每个人都有不同的天赋，不同的礼物。有的人会成为医生、工程师、企业家或社区领袖；有的人会创造艺术、开创事业，或在法庭上捍卫正义。我成为律师，是因为我有热情和能力，而后过去二十年里每天工作十四个小时，才走到今天。这并不容易，其中有过无数的疲惫、拒绝与怀疑。但我始终相信自己。这份信念和自信，就是我的第一场胜利。若没有它，我永远不会迈出第一步。

请思考查理·柯克（Charlie Kirk）的生命历程。他并非出身优渥，也没有继承财富或人脉。他从一无所有开始，凭借信念和比别人更努力的意志，一步步走出来。年轻时，他也曾面对拒绝、怀疑，还有那些告诉他“你永远不会成功”的声音。但他没有退缩，而是把这些阻力当成动力。他从零开始，建立了自己的声音、舞台和影响力。他奔走演讲，他组织活动，他为自己坚信的事业投入了无数的时间和心血。他用一生证明：在美国，你的起点，并不决定你的终点。

查理·柯克的一生就是纪律与远见能带来成就的证明。他没有把青春浪费在平庸和短暂的享乐之上，而是把自己全然投入到建设比他个人更宏大的事业中。他启发年轻人独立思考，承担责任，珍惜让这个国家强大的原则。如今，在他离世之后，共和党承认他是社会的基石之一——一个其影响与遗产将传承数代的人物。

他的旅程提醒我们，伟大从来不是被给予的，而是靠斗争、坚持和勇气赢得的。查理·柯克 初只是一个普通的年轻人，但因为他拒绝放弃，拒绝袖手旁观，他成为了一个领袖。他的人生向你们传达一个信息：你们同样可以从无到有，你们同样可以成为基石，不仅仅在你们的社区里，更能在整个国家里。

发现你自己的力量

你们必须找到自己擅长的东西。不要追逐别人的梦想，而要追逐你们自己的。如果你热爱数学，就去追求；如果你擅长沟通，就不断磨练；如果你天生是领袖，就勇敢站出来。但无论选择什么，都要以纪律、勇气和决心，去超越别人对你的期待。因为如果你们自己都不去努力，就不会有人替你们努力。如果你们拒绝尝试，你们永远不会知道自己能走多远。

尊重父母

后，我想和你们谈谈“尊重”。在我们的文化中，尊敬父母是根基，不是过时的观念。父母有时看似苛刻，要求你们超出自己的极限，显得不近人情。但请停下来想一想：这是因为他们不爱你们，还是因为他们想保护你们？有些年轻人因愤怒而加入帮派， 后虚度一生在牢狱里；有些年轻女孩过早追求所谓的独立，离家出走，结果未成年便怀孕，背负起沉重的人生。这些悲剧并不少见，往往是因为孩子们将父母的管教误解为压迫。

有一句话说，尊重必须靠赢得。这在许多人际关系中确实正确。但请你们想一想：在这世界上，如果有谁已经当之无愧值得你们尊敬，那不正是你们的父母吗？还有谁会为了你们而离开故乡，放弃熟悉的语言与生活，跨越半个地球忍受孤独与歧视？还有谁会为了你们拼命工作，直到身体酸痛，却依旧咬牙坚持第二天再出发？如果这些都不值得尊重，那么还有什么值得？

让父母为你们感到骄傲

让你们的父母为你们感到骄傲。太多时候，我听到年轻人抱怨说：“我的父母只是想控制我。”但是请停下来想一想：他们真的是要控制你们吗？还是他们在引导你们，让你们不要迷失、不要软弱？他们并不是付出一切，只是为了养育一个虚度光阴、无所作为、整天抱怨、只会成为别人负担的孩子。他们希望你们能够自己站起来，成为一个有生产力、受人尊敬、能干有用的人。他们希望看到你们成长为一个能为社会增添价值的人，而不是拖累社会的人。父母每天早晨醒来，并不是想着如何限制你们的自由，而是忧心如何保护你们不至于失败，如何让你们做好承担责任的准备。当他们督促你们时，是因为他们知道生活会比他们更严厉地逼迫你们。当他们要求你们守纪律时，是因为他们知道如果没有纪律，你们只会陷入懒惰。他们希望看到你们的成功，不仅仅是因为你

们可以过上好生活，更因为等他们年老疲惫时，他们能带着骄傲说：“那是我的儿子，那是我的女儿。”

华人子女们，我怀着深情与急切告诉你们：“美国梦”不是天上掉下来的，它必须靠你们去争取。父母已经给了你们根基、机会和起点。现在该由你们去继续搭建未来。尊重他们，比你想象中更努力地去工作，发现自己的天赋，相信自己。不要满足于平庸，要追求伟大。

刘龙珠律师的的致辞

今天我站在这里，并不只是作为人群中的一个声音。我是被培养出来的，是从小就在这些价值观中成长起来的。这些不是书本上的道理，也不是偶然间学来的理论，而是家族代代相传的原则。

尤其是我的叔父，世界敬仰的佛教大师星云法师，亲自教导并传承给我的。他是一位精神领袖，教导人们慈悲、纪律与奉献。

从他那里，我学到真正的力量并不是财富或地位，而是为他人付出的牺牲。从他那里，我学到尊敬父母、生活自律、服务社会，不是陈旧的传统，而是永恒的价值。 从他那里，我学到领导不是为了追求荣耀，而是为了肩负责任。

这些价值观塑造了我、养成了我，并让我注定要将它们继续传承下去。正因如此，今天我呼吁大家：与我团结在一起，不只是跟随一个人，而是跟随一位与你们有着相同故事、相同奋斗和相同梦想的领路人。让我们共同守护尊敬、家族荣誉和坚持不懈的文化价值观。

如果我们共同坚守这些价值观，就没有克服不了的障碍。只要我们不忘本源，就没有任何挑战能够抹去我们所建立的一切。让我们带着自豪向前迈进，把过去的牺牲化为未来的力量，向世人展示：移民的子女不是软弱的、不是迷失的，而是团结一致、勇敢无畏、注定要以勇气来领导前行。

“美国梦”依然存在，它正等待着你们。加入我吧。

 

Letter to the Children of Immigrants 

Long Z. (David) Liu 

Sons and Daughters of our Immigrant Community, 

When your parents first set foot in America, they carried with them more than just suitcases and passports. They carried hope. They carried the weight of generations past, the responsibility of continuing family honor, and the dream that their children, you, would live a life brighter and freer than they ever could. 

The Sacrifices of Our Parents 

For many of our parents, the American Dream was not about luxury. It was about survival. I know parents who worked from dawn to midnight in restaurants, washing dishes until their hands cracked from the hot water. I know mothers who stood for twelve hours behind a sewing machine in a factory, their backs bent, their eyes strained, all so their children could have lunch money for school. I know fathers who drove taxis through dangerous neighborhoods at night, silently praying they would return home safely, just so their families could pay the rent. These are not stories from far away. They are the daily sacrifices of countless immigrant parents in America. 

Why They Endured Hardship 

And why did they endure this hardship? It was not for themselves. They did not leave their homeland, their culture, and the comfort of a familiar life just to struggle here. They came because of you. They came so that you could sit in a classroom instead of a factory, so that you could speak proper English, so that you could grow up with the freedom to dream. 

They Paid the Price So You Would Not Have To 

They paid the price so you would not have to. Every drop of sweat, every sleepless night, every humiliation silently endured was a down payment for your future. They gave up comfort so you could have choices, swallowed their pride so you could walk with dignity, and bore the struggles of survival so you could focus on growth. The battles they fought were not theirs to win, but yours to inherit. And now, because of their sacrifice, you stand at a place where you can pursue knowledge, ambition, and success without carrying the same burdens they carried. 

 

Rejecting Mediocrity and The Truth About the American Dream 

Yet, too often, I see children of this generation wasting this gift. Too many are content with mediocrity, telling themselves that being “decent” is enough. But mediocrity is not what your parents came for. They came for greatness. 

The American Dream is not a bedtime story. It is not a myth. It is a reality for those who are willing to work. Do not be fooled by the empty phrase, “I’ll just do what makes me happy.” How can you be truly happy if you live paycheck to paycheck, constantly anxious about whether you can pay next month’s rent? How can you find peace if your fridge is empty, if your parents grow old and sick and you cannot afford to help them? How can you be proud of yourself if you avoid talking about achievements, because deep down, you know you don’t have any? Real happiness is not found in temporary pleasures. It is found in building a life where you don’t have to worry about survival, where you can hold your head high because you reached your potential. 

No Single Path to Success 

But I must tell you something important: there is no single path to this Dream. There is no exact map, no formula. Each of you has a different talent, a different gift. Some of you may become doctors, engineers, entrepreneurs, or leaders in your communities. Some of you may create art, build businesses, or defend justice in courtrooms. I became a lawyer because I had the passion and ability, and then I worked 14 hours every day for the last 20 years to get to where I am today. It was not easy. There were nights of exhaustion, rejection, and doubt. But I believed in myself. That belief and that confidence was the first victory for me. Without it, I would never have taken the first step. 

Consider the life of Charlie Kirk. He was not born into privilege, nor did he inherit wealth or connections. He started with nothing but conviction and a willingness to work harder than others. As a young man, he faced rejection, doubt, and the voices of people who told him he would never make a difference. But instead of giving in, he used those obstacles as fuel. He built his voice, his platform, and his influence from the ground up. He traveled, he spoke, he organized, and he gave countless hours to the cause he believed in. He showed us that in America, where you start does not determine where you end up. 

Charlie Kirk’s life is proof of what discipline and vision can accomplish. He did not waste his youth chasing mediocrity or temporary pleasures and he committed himself to building something larger than himself. He inspired young people to think critically, to embrace responsibility, and to value the principles that make this nation strong. And now, in the wake of his death, the Republican Party itself recognizes him as one of the cornerstones of our society, a man whose influence and legacy will be felt for generations. 

His journey reminds us that greatness is never handed down. It is earned through struggle, persistence, and courage. Charlie Kirk began as one ordinary young man, but because he refused to quit, because he refused to live as a bystander, he became a leader. His life is a message to you: that you, too, can rise from nothing, that you, too, can become a cornerstone, not only in your community, but in this nation. 

Discover Your Own Strengths 

You must discover what you are good at. Do not chase someone else’s dream. Chase your own. If you love math, pursue it. If you are gifted in communication, sharpen that skill. If you are a natural leader, step forward. But whatever you choose, pursue it with discipline, with courage, and with the determination to go further than anyone expects. Because if you do not put your mind to it, no one else will. And if you refuse to try, you will never know how far you could have gone. 

Respect Your Parents 

And finally, I want to speak to you about respect. In all of our cultures, respect for parents is a cornerstone. It is not old-fashioned, it is the foundation of family. Your parents may seem harsh at times. They may demand more from you than you think you can give. They may appear strict, unwilling to compromise. But stop and ask yourself: is it because they don’t love you, or is it because they want to protect you? Some young men, out of anger, rebel by joining gangs, wasting their futures behind bars. Some young women, seeking independence too quickly, run away, only to end up pregnant before adulthood, burdened by struggles they never anticipated. These tragedies are not rare, and they happen because children mistake discipline for oppression. 

There is a saying that respect must be earned. And that is true, in many relationships. But think about this: if anyone in the world has already earned your respect, is it not your parents? Who else would leave their homeland, their language, their comfort zone, travel halfway across the globe, and endure hardship so you could have opportunity? Who else would work until their bodies ache, endure discrimination, humiliation, and loneliness, and still get up the next morning to provide for you? If that does not deserve your respect, then what does? 

Make Your Parents Proud 

Make your parents proud. Too often, I hear young people say, “My parents are just trying to control me.” But pause and think: are they truly trying to control you, or are they trying to guide you so you do not grow up lost and weak? They did not sacrifice everything to raise a child who will waste away, doing nothing, complaining about everything, and becoming a burden on others. They want you to stand on your own feet, to be productive, respected, and capable. They want to see you grow into someone valuable to society, not someone who drags it down. Your parents do not wake up every morning thinking about how to limit your freedom; they wake up worrying about how to protect you from failure and prepare you for responsibility. When they push you, it is because they know life will push you harder. When they demand discipline, it is because they know that without it, you will drift into laziness. They want to see you succeed, not only so you can live well, but so that when they are old and tired, they can look at you and say with pride: “That is my son, that is my daughter.” 

Sons and daughters, I tell you this with love and urgency: the American Dream is not handed to you. It must be claimed. Your parents gave you the foundation, the chance, and the opportunity. Now it is your responsibility to build upon it. Respect them. Work harder than you think possible. Discover your gifts. Have confidence in yourself. Strive not for mediocrity, but for greatness.  

Message from Long Z. Liu 

I do not stand here today simply as another voice in the crowd. I was built into this work, raised from childhood with the values that guide me today. These were not lessons I read in books or theories I picked up in passing. They were the living principles passed down to me by my family, and above all, by my uncle, the great Venerable Master Hsing Yun, who is respected around the world as a spiritual leader and teacher of compassion, discipline, and service. 

From him, I learned that true strength is not found in wealth or status, but in sacrifice for others. From him, I learned that respect for parents, discipline in daily life, and community service are not old traditions; they are eternal values. And from him, I learned that leadership is not about seeking glory, but about shouldering responsibility. 

I was raised into these values, shaped by them, and built to carry them forward. That is why I call on you today: rally behind me, not as one individual, but as a leader who shares your story, your struggle, and your dream. Rally with me to preserve the cultural values of respect, family honor, and perseverance that Master Hsing Yun himself taught to make sure they continue to guide not only us, but the generations that will follow. 

If we stand together in these values, no obstacle is too great. If we remember who we are, no challenge can erase what we have built. Let us walk forward with pride, turning the sacrifices of the past into the strength of the future, and showing the world that the sons and daughters of immigrants are not weak, not lost, but united and determined to lead with courage. 

The American Dream is alive. It is waiting for you. Join me.